Okay, so I went to the doc because of all my issues. She ordered a bunch of blood work, ew. It came back weird. My thyroid is okay, yay. Liver and kidneys are great. Basically, everything was fine. Except I had some extra stuff. So I might be posting some news I never thought I would. According to doc, I might be pregnant.

Sometimes the universe gives you a win.
Me, calling in: Hi, I need to call in for tonight's shift.
Phone Guy: Okay, reason?
Me: The Spanish Inquisition.
Phone Guy: Huh, didn't expect that.
We had a good laugh about it.

I can't unsee it!!!! I need bleach for my brainz.

Mews News: Today, Miss Mews had an adventure! She decided to pounce me when my back was turned. I bent over to pick up something, don't remember what, and she ran head first into my butt. Then she ran away crying. All I saw was her poofy tail.

I liked this.

Howdy folks. I don't get political, um, pretty much ever. But I want this.

Really, Kohl's? What's wrong with this sale?

I started chattering to Mews. She stopped and stared and tried to figure out wtf I was doing. I'm still snickering about it.

So trouble has been brewing with my arm. I was supposed to back to work tonight, but burned a personal day on the first day of the year.

I would like to thank Dr. Dre for instantly knowing the main answer to this.